the gym is not for me

New post!!
So I started writing something totally different that I had planned for this post, and then I realized I was having a very blah day so I did some yoga and meditation. When I was done, I had so many thoughts and figured I should just start writing and put it into a post! 
Growing up dancing my whole life, exercise was never something I ever had to even think about, but now that I switched programs, I don’t dance everyday. This means that for the first time ever, physical activity isn’t just build in to my life. I figured that I would just start going to the gym this year, but it turns out it’s just not that easy for me. 

I think the environment of last year, subconsciously took a toll on my relationship towards my body. I started feeling like I wasn’t doing enough to keep my body looking the way I wanted it to look but I also wasn’t enjoying forcing myself to go to the gym, it was feeling more like a punishment to myself. I physically did not enjoy it, and I also just felt like I had no idea what I was doing. So since the start of this year I’ve just been figuring out how I can feel good about my body again using a form of exercise that I enjoy and can stick to. It’s really important to me to do things that I enjoy rather than dragging myself to do things I’m dreading, especially after choosing to switch programs.

​So after today’s yoga practice and meditation, I realized that yoga IS a work out. Just because I won’t be running on a treadmill, lifting weights, or doing crunches, doesn’t mean it doesn’t count. Not only do I not hate it, but I actually enjoy it, and I feel good doing it!
I now feel like there are just too many negitive connotations in my mind, with going to the gym, at least for the time being. So this is me trying to find an alternative that I don’t feel bad about. It is obviously a totally different dynamic, because working out in a typical sense, is super physical, whereas yoga is very much connected to the mind and soul. I know that going to the gym and doing a typical work out has that same connection for some people, but it just doesn’t for me. Yoga is gentle on my body and mind, it is enjoyable and peaceful and it makes me happy.

I’ve also been learning that yoga is a very open practice, and it’s nice to know that I can always make it my own and do what feels good depending on what my body needs. Every time I practice, I learn more and enjoy it more, and I think I’m coming around to accepting that yoga might just be my gym, and that is A ok.

-Maddi